Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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