Swine flu. Run for my life!
ugly people sure do ruin things
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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