it's too hot outside to masturbate.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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