Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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