Yo dont text me then not text me
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize