Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
