office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
