Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
