Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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