If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Randomize