I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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