I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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