You really coming over, don't trick.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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