mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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