the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
