I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
