That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
The air taste purple.
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