Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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