so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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