My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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