Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
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