Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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