Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
