i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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