i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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