oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
