and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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