You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize