I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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