BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
