doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
