she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
This house was built for laser tag.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize
