But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I think i got beer on your cat.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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