is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
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