Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
