he looks like a really good dad on facebook
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
