Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
