How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
