i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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