1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
