just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
operation harelip BJ is a go
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
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