I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
