I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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