Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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