bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
