you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
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