HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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