I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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