I will die if light touches me.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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