Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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