Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
