Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
